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Moving On from a Breakup

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So how long does this process take exactly?  When will he no longer be at the forefront of my thoughts and dreams?  I hate it. I simply HATE it.

I want someone to give me the exact steps that need to be taken to feel better and the exact date that it will happen.  And I want proof.  I want someone to tell me that in two months if you do x, y and z, you won’t even recall that you were in a relationship with that loser.

Don’t get me wrong, I have good days.  Days when I can focus on work, school and my family.  Days when I’m thankful and happy.  Days when I know this was for the best.

And then there are other days when I can still physically feel the pain of my heart break.  Days that I want to crawl under the covers and hide.  Days where I want to call him and beg him to love me again.

Of course the reason we aren’t together is still very clear in my mind.  But somehow, I keep getting stuck on the fact that had he truly loved me, there wouldn’t have been an issue to begin with.

I want to feel his touch, his lips on mine, the warmth of his body next to me.  And then sometimes, I just want to punch him.

It’s all soooo conflicting.

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